DEA warns of stoned rabbits if Utah passes medical marijuana

9 Replies

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

DEA warns of stoned rabbits if Utah passes medical marijuana

stoned rabbits

Utah is considering a bill that would allow patients with certain debilitating conditions to be treated with edible forms of marijuana. If the bill passes, the state’s wildlife may “cultivate a taste” for the plant, lose their fear of humans, and basically be high all the time.  

That’s according to testimony presented to a Utah Senate panel (time stamp 58:00) last week by an agent of the Drug Enforcement Administration.

“I deal in facts. I deal in science,” said special agent Matt Fairbanks, who’s been working in the state for a decade. He is member of the “marijuana eradication” team in Utah. Some of his colleagues in Georgia recently achieved notoriety by raiding a retiree’s garden and seizing a number of okra plants.

Fairbanks said that at some illegal marijuana grow sites he saw “rabbits that had cultivated a taste for the marijuana. …” He continued: “One of them refused to leave us, and we took all the marijuana around him, but his natural instincts to run were somehow gone.”

Now, regarding rabbits. Some wild animals apparently do develop a taste for bud (and, yes, best to keep it away from your pets). But I don’t know that the occasional high rabbit constitutes grounds for keeping marijuana prohibition in place

9 thoughts on “DEA warns of stoned rabbits if Utah passes medical marijuana”

    1. Zyp Czyk Post author

      I don’t know – perhaps it’s comments taken out of context?

      Then again, considering the DEA’s current nonsensical behavior, it does seem quite possible they said exactly that.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply ↓
  3. Payne Hertz

    Yes but will the DEA please think of the squirrels! They are getting drunk on fermented fruit and causing car accidents for Geico commercials.


    Pretty soon they will be setting up stills and selling moonshine to groundhogs. Fermented apples are a gateway to other hard drugs, such as catnip and peyote, which makes squirrels really squirrely.

    Evidence is mounting of apple-related deaths among “squoils.” The CDC is calling this an “epidemic.” A DEA agent poses with one of the victims:

    Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving and try to avoid the intoxicated wildlife :)

    Liked by 1 person

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    1. painkills2

      There was a little pumpkin patch in my back yard and I watched earlier this year as someone or something slowly ate all the pumpkins. Now I know… it’s official… squirrels are addicted to pumpkins. :)

      Liked by 1 person

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  4. Kurt W.G. Matthies

    We have a lot of this problem here in Colorado, in fact there’s one of the little cannabis eating coneys living under a bush in my front yard, probably chewing up some grass as we speak?

    He and his furry friends are obviously not with the program, either zipping and zooming around like they’re auditioning for a part as one of Brando’s motorcycle gang in the Wild One, or lazing around the grass all afternoon like a lost tribe of lupine lotus eaters.

    They’re ruining our property values.

    Liked by 1 person

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