Tag Archives: essay

My Body’s Bad Glue – by Carolyn Zaikowski

My Body’s Bad Glue – ENTROPY
written by Carolyn Zaikowski – December 26, 2016

In this essay, Ms. Zaikowski describes how the “bad glue” of EDS allows us to slip and slide not just in our bodies but through our lives. She connects this physical malady to our emotional and even the existential realms – a very different viewpoint.

I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, which means my body has bad glue.

My glue, an amorphous, drunk blob or cloud, playing tricks, getting things all wrong, incapable of indicating what is real.

My genes, speaking to my body in the wrong language, refusing to bind me, utterly stupid in regards to what level of adhesion properly constructs a body.   Continue reading

Chiari with a Lyme Twist

Chiari with a Lyme twist – From Lyme & Co

I feel as if I’ve been living in a parallel universe where suffering is unending.

And I’m angry. I’m angry at the walking well. The people who wake up in the morning, get up, go about their business, without carrying around a sack on their back

And my heart is not growing in size, its shrinking.

All of me seems to be shrinking.   Continue reading

The Experience of Having Chronic Pain

What to Know to Understand the Experience of Having Chronic Pain | The Mighty

This is an excellent description of the various aspects of living with chronic pain, starting with a phrase that digs right into the heart of the experience.

Chronic pain changes everything in life, most entirely invisible to outsiders.

Many people do not seem to understand chronic pain or just how extensive its effects are, how exhausting always being in pain is, how displacing and uncertain, nor how hard that pain makes it to concentrate and think.  

Burnout – National Pain Report

Burnout – National Pain Report 

I’m starting to burn out from the relentless onslaught of anti-opioid propaganda. Every morning I dread what I’m going to see on my Twitter feed, which is focused on pain.

The anti-opioid folks are using a well-known psychological tactic: if you repeat a falsehood enough times, it is perceived as true and then vigorously defended

When even a doctor spouts unscientific hype and tells me “opioids are bad” it breaks my heart for all of us pain patients.

And it’s this heartbreak, over and over, that makes writing about it so painful.

The article in the National Pain Report was based on a previous blog entry: Burnout

 

Anti-Opioid Propaganda and Profit

I’m sickened by the tone of the anti-opioid lobby these days, which has become aggressively hostile to pain patients.

They present more propaganda than fact and attack pain patients who are legitimately taking opioids for chronic pain. They invent their own truths and blur the line between known facts and biased conjecture. Any dissent is met with hostility.

Their denigration of pain patients has reached a new low with their latest claim by A. Kolodny, leader of the anti-opioid organization, PROP:

“Anyone taking opioids regularly is addicted.” 

Whether you are in pain or not is irrelevant, whether you are taking prescription medicine or scoring heroin on the street, whether you are conscientious hard worker, or living by crime, none of that makes any difference; if you take opioids you are an addict, they insist. Continue reading

Only NON-Medical Opioid Use Leads to Heroin Use

I cringe when I hear the awful propaganda statistic that “40% of opioid prescription opioid users go on to use heroin” with its horrible implications because this statement is almost criminally misleading.

It sounds truly awful, like anyone using opioids for pain relief has a 40% chance of getting addicted. But, wait a minute…

Literally millions of people have been given opioid pain medications after major painful surgeries, and 40% of those folks certainly do NOT go on to heroin. The vast majority of patients have no problem with ending their opioid use when their pain ends.   Continue reading

CDC Guideline Assumptions are Insult to Pain Patients

As a pain patient with over 20 years of successful opioid treatment experience, I’m offended by all these pain guidelines that assume I am stupid and lazy (if my pain is even real in the first place) and that my doctor is ignorant and negligent.

I’m insulted by all their extremely negative assumptions and appalled that they broadcast such a devastating stereotype of pain patients. Coming from the central government these guidelines stigmatize patients more powerfully than anything I’ve seen so far.

They paint pain patients as lying, lazy, ignorant, whining scammers, assuming the very worst of human motives and behavior. This reminds me of the psychological truth that we are generally most bothered by others when they reflect our own shortcomings.   Continue reading

My Response to the CDC Opioid Guidelines

My Response to CDC Opioid Prescribing Guidelines

I’ve been overcome by repeated crying jags for the last couple of days since the 15th of March (2016), when the CDC finally released its “revised and reviewed” final version of the Opioid Prescribing Guidelines. I should not have been so surprised that they were almost identical to those released about 6 months ago to so much opposition.

My initial shock and disappointment in my country, so callous and dismissive of our pain, has hardened into overwhelming disgust with the CDC, the influential recovery industry, and the media-manipulated pain-free public.

The news crippled me with grief the first day and overwhelmed me with repeated meltdowns of frustrated rage the next. Today, I’m just very sad, but finally calm enough to address what happened.   Continue reading

Finding a ‘New Normal’

5 Lessons About Finding a ‘New Normal’ — Pain News Network – December 15, 2015 – Pat Akerberg

Once chronic pain and/or illness invade your life, any sense of normal that you once knew is shattered.

“Normal” implies that there’s some accepted standard or pattern that equals a widely adopted way of living or being.  It’s a consensus reality considered culturally acceptable or reliable.

But what if your medical circumstances become anything but normal overnight?

Feeling suddenly disenfranchised, without hope and alone, I longed for where I might fit again.  No wonder it was an appealing elixir to read books and articles that suggested a “new normal,” a reliable replacement for my previous one, could be found. 

It took me years, a lot of effort, and self doubt before I finally realized that the concept of “new normal” didn’t apply for me.   Continue reading

I’m dependent on narcotics; that doesn’t mean I’m an addict

I’m dependent on narcotics; that doesn’t mean I’m an addict. – Salon.com | 

I started taking opioid painkillers not long after my third and last child was born. …things started, literally, to fall apart.

To continue to climb up and down stairs, clean and cook, do my work, and care for my family, I rely on long-acting opioids, combined with high doses of Vitamin D, ibuprofen, hot baths, low-impact exercise (especially swimming), a produce-heavy anti-inflammatory diet, and rest.

In the years that I’ve been using opioids, their use has become more restricted and controversial. Continue reading